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Thursday, June 28, 2012

Epitome of a woman

It has always been the saying "behind every successful man, there is a woman." However, in light of the CHC scandal, i think women are like rocks.

Get a good one and a man steps up better. Get a bad one, a man can trip and falls. I won't comment on the sensational news, for at times like this Christians should do what is right: not judge.

On a seperate note, 2 of my girlfriends are facing marital problems. The wife thinks its the husband who caused disharmony but the husband thinks vice versa. It is very human to think bad of someone else than to reflect on ourselves first.

One driven by rage with the disharmony and fueled with insecurity, sought help from monks to cast spells ($1500). This stops her husband from getting an errection besides when with her during this trying time of their marriage.

I disapproved and advised her to not meddle with the supernatural.

From their stories (though not enough to be a study), i've found that women tend to speak without thinking while men tend to hold back from communicating. Male chauvinists also prefer to sweep things under the carpet and avoid acknowledging there IS a problem.

Arguing shouldn't take place over text messages. However, a woman have no qalms sending one laden with accusations. We need to understand men do not respond to accusations over text messages well. So we only set ourselves up for much distraught when we don't get a reply.

Instead, i feel that whenever there is a need for a verbal release (as women, we love lashing out) but the man is avoiding it, write a letter instead.

Taking a moment to write helps you think better and rephrase to sound less hurtful. Always remember that words once said can't be withdrawn and the hurt can't be reversed and may remain etched in memory forever. This letter can carry the hurt you're feeling and your expectations from your partner.

This can then be given to your man in an unconfrontational way. I've released my hurt many times by pouring out over physical writing. Its effectiveness may not be confirmed but i do know that it contains my anger and refrained my tongue from poisonous words. I believe in keeping myself in check than taking it out on someone.

I've read the book Why Men Marry Bitches. I find the book heavily misinterpreted from the girls around me. They believe they keep their men on their toes by keeping them wondering when they're going to leave with other suitors by behaving mysteriously.

I don't believe keeping or building a relationship based on mistrust and insecurities. But what do i know? Despite trusting and not possessing my boyfriends, i still got cheated on.

So i can't say which strategy is right or wrong! Rather,its about finding one who holds the right values.

Love is like a lorikeet. The more you chase it, the more it hops away. The moment you care less, it comes to stay.


Anonymous said...

Found your blog a couple days ago while doing a search for Yemen's wonderland "Socotra". Very interesting posts, both thoughtful, and intriguing. Sounds like you have a very adventurous and fruitful life. Thanks for sharing.

Blur said...

Totally agree with you on your perspectives on what the "normal" women do and the reaction of the men. If only more women are like you. Great piece. :)

Xtine said...

I'm sorry i didn't provide much info on Yemen! But totallly appreciate u leaving an encouraging comment nonetheless.

Xtine said...

I'm a flawed but improving woman :) thank you for your touching comment

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