In the female shower room, I like being a voyeur. I look at breasts, I look at asses, I look at panties. I was surprised to see many older women actually wearing sexy lingerie! The judgmental side of me went “Woah, Aunties also know how to be sexy leh. But their ass is saggy, but again, she is wearing sexy underwear!! How does she know how to?!?”

When I visited Hong Kah Point (Blk 501-508, Jurong West) over the weekend, I figured out how Aunties knew about staying sexy underneath. It’s because, in the heartlands, lingerie as tantalizing as Victoria Secrets or La Senza is being sold! And when it’s $1.90, do you think the Aunties will think twice?!?

The Bra House: Without a fancy store name, you pay 1/10 the price.

My colleague spent $79 for a g-string in lieu of her first night of consummation. That’s for a measly piece of cloth that is barely covers. It may be a French brand, but I believe the $1.90 found in the heartlands will also garner a standing ovation. The men can’t tell!

Another girlfriend only wears cotton because she always thought her husband felt lace and bright bold colours scream slut and so she stays virginal with pastel cotton panties like a school girl (if her husband is turned on by that, it's a sign of a paedophile).

Like finding the right bikini to suit your body type to choosing the right clothes to accentuate body parts, here’s the Panty Guide for sex appeal. And because it’s Chinese New Year, I picked red on purpose. Be lucky, be sexy!

G-String

Offering the least coverage, this is virtually invisible under clothes. Wear this if you are wearing a figure hugging or lightly translucent bottom. Visible panty line is a huge fashion boo-boo.

For whom: Be honest. Is your ass nicely rounded and cellulite free? If it isn’t, the G-string isn’t for you when without clothes on.

Comfort level: 2/10 you will often feel something is up your ass, literally.

Please avoid butterfly mortifs like this though. It makes you look like a hooker.

Thong

Also known as a T-back, a lot more comfortable than the g-string, the thong is a sexy little no-show. It offers a hint more coverage than the G, yet perfect under the most revealing fashions.

For whom: Same as the G

Comfort level: 5/10 sometimes it can still get scrunched up and you will again feel something is up your ass, literally.

Cheeky

Now, the cheeky is as the name implies. A little panty with lots of cheek peek. More back coverage than a thong but less than a bikini. The perfect pick for when a little reveal is all you want.

For whom: The ones who are honest enough to admit they don’t have a nice ass but thick skinned enough to insist on showing her ass.

Comfort level: 10/10 almost as comfy as a period panty

Bikini

The underthing for everything. It’s the most common type in any panty wardrobe. Make it sexier with a string option instead of the usual band.

For whom: anybody and everybody, mostly pubescent girls, where they buy in box packs.

Comfort level: 10/10

Briefs/ Hip huggers

These border on a thin line between sexy and frumpy. Wait, forget sexy, you can’t make this sexy unless you look like a Victoria Secrets angel. Even if it’s lace or in never-fail-black. Looking very much like grandma panties aka girdles, these ARE the period panties.

For whom: anyone having the time of the month. Note: not time of her life.

Comfort level: 10/10 only that your confidence and sexiness level will plummet to 1.

Boyshorts

The best for the last, this is the MOST flattering for all body types. It’s a sure-win combination. Lace + boy shorts cut. It’s comfy, it’s cute and it gives a very flirty silhouette.

For whom: Flat asses get the illusion of a perk ass. Huge asses take the attention away from it being big. Perky asses, speechless.

Comfort level: 10/10, this is NOT period panties.

The right Lingerie can Make a Woman
feel Confident & Sexy.

The 'tourist' who actually knew Sentosa even better than i do. I'm gonna stay out of the sun for a while now...totally baked. Its not good for your skin you know!! As i get older, got to care for the crow's feet, age spots yadda yadda...

But er...maybe after i try cable-skiing first, and er...also after i finish my scuba diving course.

Oooh, this is so exciting. My life is becoming active again!

Introducing... the amazing amateur photographer friend of mine. Yes, he's in my reflection. Its always the amateurs who produce nice pics u know. I've had studio shoots by professionals, but not all of them turn out nice. Worse is, when they pick the ugliest one of me to front their product. Eesh...

I totally do not understand why i ALWAYS have this spastic look at the beach.

And then totally out of relevance, i back track to before the beach. Isn't this like a movie? U move forward, then flash back abit, then move forward.

Actually it's coz i batch upload. And you know i don't have the patience of reorganizing them.

Thanks to my air stewardess friend who invited me to join her and her friends. I've a new resolution. That is to stop being such a rigid boring person who just goes home to run everyday after work. One who only goes out if it fits her schedule. I'm gonna be more spontaneous from now on.

This dinner was interesting in a way, coz i thought i was joining her and her friends right. It ended somewhat like a speed dating concept. Not everyone knew everyone there. So there was alot of introducing to do. Which is all good, except the ratio of guys to girls was 3:1. 3 girls to 1 guy. So not a good thing for me. Hahahaha..but at least the girls were quite amiable. So i'm not complaining about making new friends. And i bet my existing guy friends are happier because those girls are actually quite pretty.

So then, fast forward again...Saturday we joined Cleo magazine to set the record of the most number of girls in bikinis to form the letter CLEO. I picked the alphabet 'C' naturally. I don't think the event was successful (ok, my real reason there was to spy on the 'competitor' Muahaha) Not successful because not ALOT of hot babes turned up (yay for me, because i hate crowds!) But the goodie bag was pretty neat. Except that the coke can burst and flooded my goodie bag!

Ok, i underestimated Singapore's beach. It can produce just as vibrant colours as Australia's. But of course, our sea is not as clean as theirs. Although ours is man-made, theirs is natural. You would think our maintenance would be better! But bleah...so darn dirty.

When i just started yoga, i nearly fell asleep! It was SOOOOO darn boring. Seriously, yoga is not for me. I can't stay still. But after doing for a few months, i'm beginning to think its a good work out. Challenging in fact. I look forward to each class now. Best of all, its only $2 per class. Subsidized by company :P

Oh, but i must tell you something funny!! In my first lesson right, this woman was in front of me...her ass was right in front of my face when we bend over..then suddenly, *pooooot*

She farted!! I was like 'waaaaaaat', then the person beside me farted too!! And everyone was like nonchalant. And then....er...erm...i farted too.

Ok, apparently all that stretching releases some gas.

The amateur photographer did some editing. He should have enlarged the top, size down the bottom though.

I'm like a pizza delivery girl.

So auntie-ish! Like we went shopping.

This was totally candid. It looked like we were bathing. Actually, someone really was washing their clothes there. Foreigners..guess who? Don't sue. Hahaa

The flip flops totally spoilt the look. As Dixi commented before about my shoes in my Hong Kong pics....haha..

Oh, shoot..i forgot to take a picture of this girl!! Oh my gosh, she turned up for this event right decked in 4 inch HEELS, heavy make-up (this still ok as most girls did anyway. Its Cleo's Swimsuit shoot!), and she wore a dramatic floppy hat! Not being shallow here, but her looks and body didn't make average. Wait, maybe that's how she'll draw attention.