5 Excuses Men Give

Today, we live in a world where it is more dramatic losing your iPhone than your virginity.

We have mobile apps that can do anything imaginable including keeping mosquitos at bay. Unfortunately, no one has invented one that you can put by your bedside table and it'll protect you from pregnancy, STD and HIV.

We sleep with our phones next to our bed, here's an iPhone case that holds a condom.
Buy here.

Here's the brutal truth. SINGAPOREANS ARE IGNORANT ABOUT SEX.

Despite Singapore ranked the bottom two on the global index for having the least sex, it is not an excuse to be ranked the highest in unsafe sex.

We resemble the ostrich. We burry our heads in sand and tell ourselves "it won't happen to us." Little did we know, the ostrich do not actually burry its head in sand when faced with danger and we shouldn't be resisting protection before its too late.

I would have been one of those, until i witnessed myself 4 friends who had shotgun marriages of which 1 failed and 1 on the verge of failing. The worst was the one (not included in the 4) where they had unprotected BREAK-UP sex and the girl fell pregnant and the guy wanted nothing to do with it. She went on to become a single mum.

If only she used a condom, because it was a non committal thrust. 

Then, there was the other time i saw a woman walking out of the Action for Aids clinic wailing and thumping the chest of the man with her. She was hysterical and the man looked guilty.

If only she used a condom, because for $30 extra, prostitutes will do it the bare-back way.

There was also the friend who felt responsible for his pregnant girlfriend, stressed for the whole of 10 months. Then, she told him in the labour room that the baby wasn't his.

If only he had used a condom, he wouldn't have a mental break-down.

The Durex Global Wellbeing 2012 revealed that Singaporean students are 20 times less likely than global standards to use a condom at first time. Subsequently, 2 in 5 Singaporeans will not use condoms regularly.

What i found more interesting was the Durex 2011 survey that found Singaporean men to have an average of 16 sex partners, the same number as Hong Kong and the highest in Asia. Singaporean women have an average of 6 sex partners, up from 3 previously. We are also the second highest number in Asia, just behind the Japanese.

So we are really having alot of sex, just not wanting children, contrary to popular belief that Singaporeans aren't having enough sex. Some 19% of Singaporean women admitted that they were unfaithful to their spouses, placing local women among the top five most unfaithful in the world.

Malaysian men appear to have the lowest average number of sex partners at just 3. Gay men have the highest average number of sex partners at 108 and lesbian women have an average number of 11 sex partners.

This means that the person you're having sex with have had unprotected sex with many others before you. Dollar notes have the most bacteria because it passed through many hands.

Yes, IT CAN HAPPEN TO US, especially when some STD(s) are not detectable on the surface. HIV and STD are more prevalent amongst heterosexual couples than homosexuals because we are ignorant not using condoms and we tell ourselves "it won't happen to me".

While two young virgins don't have to worry about diseases, an inexperienced boy may still make you pregnant with his pre-cum!

There's really TOO MUCH worry not using a condom.

Parents can't be ostriches too. Their youths will have and are having sex. One can only teach if not abstinence then teach how to put on a condom.



In case you are shy about getting a dildo to practice on, use a dog's tail!

As a woman, i can understand how we are easily weakened by men's pleas and wriggles to get out of a condom, pun intended. I hope reading the excuses below helps you identify and better armed with an answer AND a condom when it happens.

1. Baby, its too tight for me, i feel uncomfortable.

Oh baby, i got you the DUREX COMFORT. It's 56mm, a whole 7mm than the usual fit. Show me how you FILL IT UP, you BIG BOY.

2. Baby, if you wear a glove to dig your nose, will your nose feel comfortable?

Oh baby, i appreciate you thinking for my pleasure but unless you're a boar, you wouldn't have a ribbed penis will you? DUREX PLEASURE MAX gives both of us extra stimulation with a dotted texture.

3. Baby, it's too thick, i'll lose my feeling!

Oh baby, i know, that's why there's DUREX FEATHERLITE ULTIMA, 20% thinner than the standard to maintain sensitivity.

4. Baby, it may slip off! You may need to go to the hospital to get it out if it does!!

Oh baby (DO NOT snicker at his small package), there's DUREX CLOSE FIT. I'm not afraid.

5. But baby.....it's my birthday!

I'll put it on WITH MY MOUTH and sing you happy birthday.



Just remember, if you use a condom at your first time, you will be 2.1 times more likely to have confidence in life and 2.4 times more likely to be satisfied with your overall sex life.

If you love yourself, you'll insist on protection.
If you love your partner, you won't want to ruin his/her life.
If you love your child, YOU WON'T BE AN OSTRICH!

Play Safe, I love You.

Freedom to Love.

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Odd International Sex Laws

WHILST these wildly amusing laws are found around the world....

In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death. (Are your eyebrows rising?)

In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror. (I say doctors in Bahrain must be experts in writing inverse love notes. Romantic.)

There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time.

Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry
In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act. (Mummy must feel proud and wipe a tear to know her girl's grown up.)

In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time. (This was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)
Singapore Laws
ONE of Singapore's law under the Miscellaneous Offences (Public Order and Nuisance) Act: "Any person who is found guilty of any riotous, disorderly or indecent behaviour in any public road or in any public place or place of public amusement or resort, or in the immediate vicinity of, or in, any court, public office, police station or place of worship, shall be guilty of an offence and shall be liable on conviction to a fine not exceeding $1000 or to imprisonment for a term not exceeding one month and in the case of a second or subsequent conviction, to a fine not exceeding $2,000 or to imprisonment for a term not exceeding 6 months."
So yes, it's loud and clear that you can't be having public sex display in Singapore.

Even though in Bozeman, Montana, has a law that bans all sexual activity between members of the opposite sex in the front yard of a home after sundown-- if they're nude. Notice how specific the law is, which means you can find ways around it. Like, having sex with the same sex in the front yard of a home is ok. Having sex with opposite sex in the front yard of a home before sundown. Or having sex in the front yard of a home after sundown but not completely naked. Wear socks.

Despite Singapore having a reputation of being tame and safe, expats and tourists are surprised to find out from me (the Singapore Promotion Girl nonetheless) that Geylang, legit whore fun exists along side hor fun.

Thus i am tickled by Okamoto's latest Freedom campaign that describes Singaporeans to a T.

In Singapore, the only difference between a wolf and a sheep is what time they finish work. Walk into the sleazy pubs or KTVs in Tanjong Pagar and see men all shapes, size, colour and age fondling and giving toothy grins. There used to be the preconception that Caucasians are more promiscious, but i always thought it's the Asians who are better at concealing.

Car Sex

It's safe to make love while parked in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho. Police officers aren't allowed to walk up and knock on the window. Any suspicious officer who thinks that sex is taking place must drive up from behind, honk his horn three times and wait approximately two minutes before getting out of his car to investigate.

Lovers in Liberty Corner, New Jersey, should avoid satisfying their lustful urges in a parked car. If the horn accidentally sounds while they are frolicking behind the wheel, the couple can face a jail term.

While the two countries have laws about car sex, it is an ambiguity in Singapore. Whilst we cannot be having sex in public, if it is in the privacy of a car and away from the public eye, it is permissible?

In fact, in 1991, for example, when the government began offering cash bonuses to couples with more than two children, the newspaper printed tips for having sex in the back seat of a car including directions to some of the "darkest, most secluded and most romantic spots" for parking.

It suggested using newspapers to cover the windows for privacy.

Using newspapers is distasteful and cheapskate.

So the Okamoto Freedom Project created the Urban Camouflage. It's a set of temporary decals for your car's windows, from front to side to back, which makes your car look empty, even when it's not. Perfect for the car parks in East Coast.

Price: SGD 69


After all, if you do it in public outdoors, you may encounter the Hantu Tek Tek.

"I was making out with my boyfriend at East Coast Park on the bridge of rocks. With our legs dangling over, the sea breeze and stars made it a romantic night. He started to fondle me and his fingers reached below my moist regions. As we kissed, i suddenly felt something staring at us. I opened my eyes, while my boyfriend was still smooching and i saw a pair of red slit eyes staring over my boyfriend's shoulder.

A chill went over me and i freezed. My boyfriend oblivious that my tongue stopped wagging continued groping me. I then start to see more than just red slit eyes. She had long thin hair that badly needs conditioning, clothed in white robes, she looked hunched and floating. She let out a silent shrill that seemed over audible to me. She reached out for my boyfriend's neck and closed around him.

My boyfriend finally responded! He frozed and his eyes turned glassy. I then noticed it wasn't a hunch on her back, there were two humps and it dawned upon me what type she is! Remembering Hantu Tek Tek who apparantly died from child birth, a significant characteristic are her breasts that are placed on her back. The only way to ward her off is to flash her of my own!

I freed myself from my boyfriend's embrace and pulled open my blouse like Super Girl. It wasn't too difficult as my blouse was already unbuttoned. Hantu Tek Tek screamed and disappeared.

It all happened within a few seconds but it felt like ages. When my boyfriend came round to, we both realised i've wet my pants."

For location ideas, read here.
For car positions, read here.

I've walked in on You Before.

To date, i have walked in on people twice before. They weren't expecting anyone to come in but i did. The other time, i caught the mirror reflection in the toilet.

I remember writing about how cheaters will often get found out via the forces of nature, but it is better to let down your partner gently instead of letting him/her walk in on you.

So Okamoto Freedom Project created an iPhone app called TipOff, which turns your phone into an early warning device. Just set it up to face your front door, link it to your partner’s phone, and it’ll keep an eye out while you’ve got your hands full.
Afterall, cheating partners are on the rise here in Singapore at the same time as Singaporeans are getting savvy stalking. People are just better playing Hide and Seek these days.

Price: USD 0.99


Put a Cap On
Official surveys have shown that Singaporean men detest rubbers. Often described as "Which feels better, digging your nose with a finger or digging your nose with a glove?"

I did a quick survey among my female friends and ALL of them do not use protection. It was shocking. With the increasing incidence of cheating (both men and women), what if one brought a disease back? Other than the obvious fact of pregnancy. Some told me their partners detest it and they are afraid to insist on it. They didn't want to dampen the moods.

Nightcap priced $6.90 is a condom, hidden in a coaster and is available at Loof and OverEasy. For those nights when things just seem to fall into your lap.

Singaporeans need to be more sexually aware. That includes regular STD checks, Pap smears and using condoms that give you freedom.

Input your email on the top right corner to win a set of Freedom products (Urban Camouflage, Night Cap and Tip Off).
Winner will be picked on 28 Jan 2012.

Freedom from fear, freedom of anxiety, freedom to love.

http://www.okamotofreedom.com/