The Panty Guide

In the female shower room, I like being a voyeur. I look at breasts, I look at asses, I look at panties. I was surprised to see many older women actually wearing sexy lingerie! The judgmental side of me went “Woah, Aunties also know how to be sexy leh. But their ass is saggy, but again, she is wearing sexy underwear!! How does she know how to?!?”

When I visited Hong Kah Point (Blk 501-508, Jurong West) over the weekend, I figured out how Aunties knew about staying sexy underneath. It’s because, in the heartlands, lingerie as tantalizing as Victoria Secrets or La Senza is being sold! And when it’s $1.90, do you think the Aunties will think twice?!?

The Bra House: Without a fancy store name, you pay 1/10 the price.

 My colleague spent $79 for a g-string in lieu of her first night of consummation. That’s for a measly piece of cloth that is barely covers. It may be a French brand, but I believe the $1.90 found in the heartlands will also garner a standing ovation. The men can’t tell!

Another girlfriend only wears cotton because she always thought her husband felt lace and bright bold colours scream slut and so she stays virginal with pastel cotton panties like a school girl (if her husband is turned on by that, it's a sign of a paedophile).

Like finding the right bikini to suit your body type to choosing the right clothes to accentuate body parts, here’s the Panty Guide for sex appeal. And because it’s Chinese New Year, I picked red on purpose. Be lucky, be sexy!

G-String

Offering the least coverage, this is virtually invisible under clothes. Wear this if you are wearing a figure hugging or lightly translucent bottom. Visible panty line is a huge fashion boo-boo.

For whom: Be honest. Is your ass nicely rounded and cellulite free? If it isn’t, the G-string isn’t for you when without clothes on.

Comfort level: 2/10 you will often feel something is up your ass, literally.

Please avoid butterfly mortifs like this though. It makes you look like a hooker.

Thong

Also known as a T-back, a lot more comfortable than the g-string, the thong is a sexy little no-show. It offers a hint more coverage than the G, yet perfect under the most revealing fashions.

For whom: Same as the G

Comfort level: 5/10 sometimes it can still get scrunched up and you will again feel something is up your ass, literally.

Cheeky 

Now, the cheeky is as the name implies. A little panty with lots of cheek peek. More back coverage than a thong but less than a bikini. The perfect pick for when a little reveal is all you want.

For whom: The ones who are honest enough to admit they don’t have a nice ass but thick skinned enough to insist on showing her ass.

Comfort level: 10/10 almost as comfy as a period panty

Bikini

The underthing for everything. It’s the most common type in any panty wardrobe. Make it sexier with a string option instead of the usual band.

For whom: anybody and everybody, mostly pubescent girls, where they buy in box packs.

Comfort level: 10/10

Briefs/ Hip huggers

These border on a thin line between sexy and frumpy. Wait, forget sexy, you can’t make this sexy unless you look like a Victoria Secrets angel. Even if it’s lace or in never-fail-black. Looking very much like grandma panties aka girdles, these ARE the period panties.

For whom: anyone having the time of the month. Note: not time of her life.

Comfort level: 10/10 only that your confidence and sexiness level will plummet to 1.

Boyshorts

The best for the last, this is the MOST flattering for all body types. It’s a sure-win combination. Lace + boy shorts cut. It’s comfy, it’s cute and it gives a very flirty silhouette.

For whom: Flat asses get the illusion of a perk ass. Huge asses take the attention away from it being big. Perky asses, speechless.

Comfort level: 10/10, this is NOT period panties.

The right Lingerie can Make a Woman

feel Confident & Sexy.